We were running behind. Hope didn’t want to brush her hair this particular day. Shocking! She wore a purple sweat suit with matching pants. Shocked she wore those two articles of clothing together. She wore jellies with socks. Hope chooses her clothes- her style, her way. It’s very Punky Brewster-ish!
We hurriedly hopped in the BOB & headed to school. I encouraged her to brush her bed head curly locks, but she preferred to look @ the ducks & the trees & tickle her brother’s toes,instead of fussing with her blonde hair.
Us moms have to pick our battles. Shall I fret over Hope’s hair or be thankful I got her clothed & fed & in the stroller? She’s alive! Success.
I was sweating by the time we got to the preschool office. Hope hopped out of the BOB to play peek-a-boo with the secretary & to show off her eclectic ensemble for the day. This typically involves twirling. Hope likes to dress herself & enjoys her own personal style.
I start checking in like normal, thumbing through the pages to find Hope’s name & sign my name. A mom looks over @ us & rudely says, “Rough night? Huh?!?!”
She saw her hair in disarray. She saw that her clothes hadn’t been pressed. She saw that Hope was rocking jellies with socks. Hope is cute as a button. This mom’s face. She was disgusted.
“I have to pick my battles.” I said calmly.
As soon as that mom stepped out, I mentioned how rude that woman had been. I looked at Hope, “You, my dear, are beautiful whether your hair is brushed or not. You’re gorgeous, sis!”
I’ve had it with people’s comments. Think before you speak.
I remember my eclectic style in high school & college. The clothes I wore! Ha! I’d sport a lime green zippered top with black polka dots & black pants & heels. I wore what I liked & didn’t care to follow trends.
I never ever looked like the others. Never played sports. Never dressed to impress the masses.
Still true today, as I pop my hair in a pony, daily. My appearance does not define me, as I am so much more. I place importance on other stuff- it’s just who I am. As a stay at home mom, I dress for comfort. It’s yoga pants or prom, no in between! Lol!
My Hope wears clothes out of necessity. She is too busy to worry about coordinating her clothes or wearing the latest styles or brushing her hair X number of times or wearing bows that match her outfits.
My kid likes to put fun things together, to make combinations that mismatch or don’t coordinate. It is part of her creative nature.
I encourage you to not judge others by the clothes they wear or their hair or their shoes or their appearance at all. We are so much more than those petty things. We have souls & hearts & brains & smiles that mean so much more than ‘just so’ hair & coordinating outfits & non-scuffed shoes & non-dirty fingernails & freshly combed & brushed hair.
If ya see my kid, compliment her bed head look. She likes it & I love her so I will accept Hope as is, whole-heartedly.
I’ll make a point to love her from where she is. Otherwise, I’m not loving her unconditionally. These comments people make are about them, not me. See, I’m ok with messy as long as my kid is kind. I’m ok with bed head as long as my kid is caring. I’m ok with scuffed shoes as long as my kid is compassionate. I’m ok with mismatched clothes as long as my kid is accepting of others. I’m ok with dirty fingernails as long as my kid is empathetic.
We have to start focusing on what truly matters, mamas, & STOP teaching our kids that appearance trumps all because it doesn’t.
Let us not judge a person by their appearance, but by the very content of their character & how they treat others. Only kindness matters.