I’ve been struggling with worth lately. I’ve been really sad. It’s a long story. I got to thinking about this role of mother. It really isn’t something we can measure, calculate, or figure out. It’s invaluable, the most important, and the most precious work of all. I can’t think of a single more important job in the whole wide world than being a mom. What we do, day in and day out, can’t be measured, calculated, or figured out. There is no task list, check list, to do list, nor are there boxes to check off. Your work as a mother is simply never done. It’s ongoing and infinite and it is day in and day out, in sickness and in health, no matter what. There is no arrival and there is no end. Mommying is a partnership, an ever-changing & lifelong permanent connection. It is the most important work of all. Being a mother is a gift, an honor, a privilege, and a very special job. Remember who you are and not just on mother’s day, but every single day of your life. Mothering does not start at 8 and end at 5. Mommying is a verb and it’s infinite, ongoing, & a lifelong journey of unbelievable ups and unexpected downs, turbulent twists and terrific turns, filled with big bumps and painful peaks, and totally awesome twists and unpredictable turns.
Mother’s Day is not merely a single day, but rather a zillion & one good & bad days, a series of messy & amazing itty bitty moments carefully strung together & tightly wound & bound by unconditional love, constant compassion, lifelong learning, & infinite growing opportunities.
I’ve attempted to list the things moms are responsible for. It is just a small sampling of what we do as mothers. It’s unreal how much we do. May you never ever say you are ‘just a mom.’ Mom is HUGE. Mom is EVERYTHING. MOM is IRREPLACEABLE. It’s truly remarkable. Take a peek.
Remember feeling baby hiccups for the first time in utero?
Teeny tiny kicks?
Bitty baby punches?
Remember all the firsts & seconds & all the in- betweens?
Remember the feeling of sore breasts and having leaky breasts, late night feedings, to rocking baby back to sleep in the wee hours of the morning, to super duper crack of dawn early morning wake ups & seeing bedhead on your baby & loving it, to baby’s one of a kind breath & baby smells, to bitty baby toes & bitty baby giggles, to milestones, to wiping snotty noses, to the preschool jitters at drop off, to trying so hard to hold back your tears, to wiping theirs away, to stinky diaper changes, to buckling and unbuckling babies in & out of the car seat, to the sheer closeness & comfort of baby wearing, to baby hip balancing while managing to maybe brushing your hair, to bundling up your littles in warm scarves & hats & fuzzy mittens, to zipping up their coats, to tucking babies in with kisses & their favorite blanket, to making 3 meals a day every single day, to teaching your littles about brushing & flossing teeth, to attending those no good very bad & dreaded dentist visits, to all the trials and tribulations of potty training, to teaching them how to tie their shoes & how to ride their bikes without help, to modeling manners & talking about stranger danger, to teaching them about internet safety, to chatting about the birds & the bees, to attending & cheering at their soccer games, to cheering at their ballet recitals & applauding their artwork @ the art exhibits, to scheduling & taking them on play dates, to being their permanent cabbie for years, to hearing them laugh hysterically & trying your damnedest to memorize their laughs to help you get through the hard moments, to taking them to their well checks & holding their hand through shot administration, to teaching them how to be a good friend, to showing them how to share & how to be a powerful bystander instead of a rotten bully, to teaching them that vulnerability is not weakness but rather our most accurate measurement of courage, to teaching them that taking care of themselves first is essential before ever even considering taking care of others, that self-love is the most important thing in the whole wide world, to teaching them right from wrong, to teaching them that their bodies are theirs & theirs alone, that their voice is powerful and to use their voice, to teaching them that they have the right to say no or yes, to put their foot down whenever they feel as though something needs to be said or done, to teaching them to stand up for what is right & to protest when things are wrong, to respect their elders, to honor & absolutely respect teachers, to teaching them critical thinking skills, to teaching them the value of always being inquisitive, to think outside of the box, to not always go with the popular crowd but with the crowd that most speaks to their hearts, to always ask questions, to chase their dreams, to be flexible, to teach them how to create & visualize & talk about what makes them come alive, to teaching them important life skills, to showing them the way by having an absolute desire & passion & love for lifelong learning & education, to making them aware of the dangers of drugs & numbing & drinking & driving & texting & sexting, to teaching them to give people the benefit of the doubt, to always try to be way kinder than necessary, to not be taken advantage of or to be had, to be generous & assertive & strong, to showing them through modeling that crying is healthy & an absolute sign of strength & bravery, to talking about how you are feeling always, to teach self-defense tactics, to be incredibly patient, to be unconditionally loving to all living creatures, to be a good human being to all people, to build longer tables instead of higher walls, to embrace all people for the absolute truth & content of their character, to celebrate uniqueness & weirdness, to recognize that imperfections are the very things that make us one of a kind & unique, to teaching our children not to judge others but the try to understand and learn more, to accept people by meeting people right where they are, to look people in the eye when you talk to them, to listen with both ears, to always aim to show empathy always, to be honest & forgiving & forthcoming & welcoming, to give to those that have less, to give away what we have too much of without a single expectation in return, to have compassion in our hearts for those that have less & need more, to love without limits, to walk in love wherever you go, to be the bigger person whenever possible, to help at the drop of a dime, to be brave, to be real, to be transparent, to admit when you’re wrong, to walk away when something does not serve you, to teach our children to always be solid in knowing who they are (one of a kind & all the good in the whole universe) no matter what anyone around them may or may not say
Mothers are miracle workers. They can’t be replaced. Their is no substitute. May you know how incredibly special & unique you are to this big big world. You are not ordinary, but rather extraordinarily amazing & talented & relentless in your minute by minute, hour by hour, day by day, week by week, month by month, & year by year contribution & commitment of unconditional love & teachings to your children.
To raise good human beings is to change the entire world.
There is nothing more important in the whole wide world than being a mom.
Happy Mother’s Day!